We visited Pembroke, Western Wales in November 2008. It was freezing cold, getting dark by 3.30pm and we still loved every minute of it. Here are some of the best sights from this beautiful country town.
The High Street
The Millpond
Beautiful Light
Pembroke Castle Across the Millpond
Beautiful White Swans
Beautiful Views
Pembroke Castle
Pembroke Castle
The Main Tower in the Castle
Windows in The Great Hall
One of many Fire Places
I wrote this in response to the question “Is attraction marketing about being a better liar?” on BetterNetworker.com forum today.
Marketing is simply magnifying the most positive aspects of whatever system, or product, or even “you inc” you are trying to ‘sell’. Good marketing paints a picture of a life you can only dream of, freedom, happiness, fulfillment. It doesn’t expect to see everyone who buys a mobile phone to run down the road, ripping their clothes off so they can launch off their local pier and into the ocean. It simply presents a powerful association with ‘freedom’ and buying a mobile phone. (the ‘whole’ truth is what the fine print is for)
I joined my first MLM because of the promises it made.
With pages of testimonials, and comments like “we live the life of our dreams” complete with sales pitches like ‘we produce, ship, and handle your inventory for you’.
I read “Have an unbelievable life of financial freedom without doing much!”
I was caught hook line and sinker, even after I read the income disclaimer, I didn’t believe that would be me. I joined the opportunity before I even new what it was. I wasn’t lied to, but I wasn’t told, nor did I seek the whole truth. Stuff like, you may have to spend a lot of money on products for yourself, you will have to spend money on marketing and you will have to work your @#$% off, were left until later.
I do remember asking “what do you actually do? and being told we’d get to that later.
(The most difficult for me to swallow; “now you’ve joined our team for which you pay regularly, here’s some more stuff (information, services, products) for you to buy, to really get you cracking”).
What am I already paying for?
Most landing pages I’ve seen do this; Massive income promises, with a small income disclaimer, leading to a vast sales letter promising the world… Well we all know this. They work
As a potential customer, especially if it’s your first time, you only see and hear what you want, and ignore the rest. So is being told small amounts of the whole truth akin to lying?
I certainly felt tricked.
I did not receive what the sales pitch promised. I am actually not blaming the system or products for the fact the the business didn’t work for me, and potentially even if I had been given the ‘whole truth’ on the day, I still may not have heard, as I was so “blinded” by the dollar signs. In this sense the massive income claims are probably counter intuitive, as they attract people like… me!
Or the me I was back then.
I think the ‘lying’ part of attraction marking comes into play when people try and position themselves as experts, which is the most frustrating advice you can get as a new marketer. (An expert in what?)
I felt like a complete phony, which in hindsight should have quickly indicated that I was not in the right business for me.
I felt like I was lying all the time.
Unfortunately I also fell for the industry wide lies that “the only way you can fail is to quit” and “giving up on this business is giving up on yourself” (effective ways to keep you paying your monthly fees) and stayed until my money ran out. When I did make the decision to cancel it was actually liberating, like I had gained ownership of my brand once more. Rather than giving up on myself, I took responsibility and found myself in the right place. I have obviously grown a lot and realized that education and creating my own brand are steps one and two in creating a successful and ‘attractive’ presence. The nature of the beast at the moment means everyone is vying to seem the most successful, well educated, and best leader there is… BEFORE they have actually become successful, educated leaders in the industry.
I would say don’t talk the talk unless you are prepared to walk the walk (feel free however to think, feel and visualize).
The best way to ensure you are not lying to others is to make sure you are not lying to yourself. Ensure you believe in your system, your product and yourself completely, if you don’t, change.
Be the best YOU can possibly be, and people will come.
This is true Attraction Marketing.
I am woken for the first time around 5.30 am by Brendan’s alarm, and kept awake by him clambering over me (he sleeps on the wall side) to get ready for his work day. He generally sneaks out around 6 am, and if the baby doesn’t wake with the sound of the front (only) door clicking shut I can get another blissful half to one hours sleep.
I am woken for the second time much more abruptly, torn from my slumber by loud, very cranky screaming that loosely translates as “FEED ME NOW”. I unzip his bed (the baby’s bed is a tent/ travel cot) scoop him out and make my bleary eyed journey to the kitchen. As long as we haven’t run out of any key ingredients, weetbix, honey and milk are the order most days, and I prepare it (along with my morning coffee) amidst constant noisy complaints. An inhalation generally commences. Around 7am baby is fed, happy, and telling me its bath time now. (I use the term bath loosely as it is actually a bucket in the shower recess!)
Master 4 has woken up by now, hopefully not too moody, and eats his “breaky” at a far more leisurely pace (with the noisy complaints of “hurry up” coming from me)
By 8.30 am we are all fed, bathed, dressed, brushed and out the door to Nursery. I’m just about to open the door and I realize its raining…. you know… Scottish RAIN. Trainers are exchanged for “wellies” and rain coats dug out (it is still summer) and off we go again.
Thirty minutes to Nursery.
I wonder what winter will be like and I feel for the workers in the food van selling hot food to cold pedestrians.
On a nice day the walk is broken by the need to save the snails from ‘death by squashing’. Each one is gently picked up and placed in the cracks of the large bluestone wall flanking the footpath.
We arrive and huddle with the other parents and children under the small shelter waiting to be ‘let in’ and discuss the weather (a favoured pastime over here). The kids don’t care, they’re just having fun playing with their umbrellas.
2.5 hours till pick up….. Time to take the baby to play group. A couple of relaxing hours sitting round, talking, watching the little ones play. Who is play group for exactly….?
On other days I could go home and do housework but as my health nurse told me, that is a complete waste of time, so I opt for taking myself out for coffee instead. (if the baby falls asleep I can also fit in a read 
)
Pick up time often involves the receipt of handmade gifts or art work and often a bag of drenched clothes from the indoor water play! He might have stayed drier outside.
We visit a friend for the afternoon. There’s nothing like someone else’s house and toys to keep the boys amused. At home I’d be finding toys in the toilet, the Baby raiding the fridge and Master 4 complaining about…. well anything he can think of.
Here they just play. The Baby even crawls up on my lap and quietly falls asleep…. ooohhh 
After some superb hours company, and a semi difficult extraction we wander home. Both the boys fall asleep on the way, and Brendan and I spend a peaceful half hour chatting outside the building before either wakes.
Upstairs in time for dinner and bed time.
My mummy day is over and now my ‘work’ day can begin
After a quick tidy, and a cuppa I sit down to my computer and……..
It’s been a little strange.
Four whole days without any internet access from home.
(Goodness knows how we used our entire data allowance in less than a month!!)
I guess we could have taken the macbook to a local pub or cafe with free wifi.
We also could have paid a top up to get us through the last few days.
We decided instead to ‘go without’.
A couple of things happened because of our little experiment.
Firstly my readership plummeted, proving that you have to be present and involved to sustain a blog.
Secondly I got me thinking about life before The Internet.
What did we do?
How did we find out about things?
How did we keep in touch with friends?
I could go on and on.
Only four years ago we purchased our first computer (a white emac) and I remember my girlfriend had to teach me how to do a google search! I spent some time checking emails, Brendo would play some games and, well thats about it. Our first broadband plan was 200 Mb/MONTH (prior to this we would semi regularly visit internet cafe’s to check our emails)
Now we both spend some time on the web everyday. I spend at least 2 hours, and some nights have clocked up to six (I can’t believe my eyes when I read that!!)
So what did we used to do?
I almost can’t remember! I’m pretty sure I went out more, read more books (the paper kind), spent more time talking face to face with people, walked more, swam more, traveled more…. hang on maybe I’m confusing “Life Before Internet” with “Life before Children!”
And how did we find out about things?
What we couldn’t find out from the TV, news paper or magazine we probably asked someone else or read in a book. We may have even ventured a trip to the LIbrary. Potentially we were content knowing a little less?
And how did we keep up with friends?
We simply had less friends. Quality friendships rather than quantity? In many ways, the internet has made our lives busier, and has extended our circle of “friends” way beyond the capabilities of offline friendships. As a life long traveler, the internet has enabled me to reconnect with friends from all over, people I thought I’d ‘lost’, as well as keep in touch with the girls from home. This part I truly love.
So what did we do in our four days without the internet?
I guess in a way it felt a little bit like when you leave the house without your mobile, slightly disconnected, with a weird sense of freedom. We talked more (and yes sometimes about information we needed to look up once we were reconnected) played more games and watched more movies. You know, not that much really!!
What would you do?
This is not a political blog, but I was furious today when reading about this. And the irony is, the people that started this argument, the USA, have no “system”. The people who can afford private health insurance are ‘safe’ as long as they are healthy enough?! If you are already sick, you just don’t qualify.
This is obviously my opinion and is not based on personal experience.
I do however have personal experience with the NHS in Scotland.
My little one year old baby was sick with gastroenteritis and couldn’t keep anything down. (If you don’t know gastro can be very dangerous for babies as they dehydrate rapidly)
I was absolutely beside myself and didn’t know what to do, so I rang the free NHS help line, and they organized a free taxi ride to the emergency department where he was quickly seen to. He was obviously uncomfortable, but not dehydrated so we took our taxi home.
The next day he still couldn’t keep anything down and was visibly worse. I rang the helpline again and this time they organized an emergency response to the house. This wonderful man assessed my boy, calmed me down and advised us to take him to the hospital.
(NB he wasn’t an ambulance, so it was not his job to transport us).
At the Royal Hospital for Sick Kids we were seen quickly, and looked after very well. My little man was admitted for 2 nights with dehydration.
I know there were moments that frustrated me, because I am a mother and I was in a panic. Looking back, I know everyone did their job, and I didn’t have to worry about a medical bill through my letter box.
The small amount of tax we are “forced” to pay is well worth it.
I don’t think twice about taking my boys to the doctor when they are sick, and until they are 16yo any prescriptions they need are free as well.
We’re brand new to this country, and from our first check up in the NHS we’ve been treated equally and fairly.
All I can say is, Don’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it.
We were walking home from town the other day.
The boys are cruising next to each other in the double buggy (Scottish for pram) and Brendo and I are chatting away, enjoying our walk in the sunshine.
Suddenly Daniel becomes very excited…..
“Stop mum… stop. I’ve found something mum.”
I’ve mentioned before that Daniel finds pennies, but he also finds “treasure” (Daniel for Rubbish)! Anything can be treasure, bottle tops, screws, rubber bands…. you get my drift.
“What’s up little man?”
“Back there, I’ve found something special for you mum”
By now we’ve taken a few steps past this special treasure and have to stop our rather large double pram in the middle of the footpath so Daniel can drag me back.
“What is it little man?”
“There mum, thats a special thing for you mum….”
and what was the special thing?
Well its women’s business
Thats right
A Tampon!!
At this point we are doubled over LAUGHING in the middle of the West End (and we’re not the only ones).
So next time your sanitary items bounce out of your purse while crossing the road, or eyeing off someone nice,
D
on’t be embarrassed.
Just think of my little man…
and how four year olds do the funniest things
The next few months are going to be busy in our little house, so in an attempt to get it all straight in my own head, I thought I’d fill you in on my plans.
MY CLAN
I’ve decided to take a journey into my family history here in Scotland. My interest has been kindled by the fact that we’re here, and it is the year of the Homecoming in Scotland (more on that in later post). I also hadn’t realized until recently that my father’s family hail from here as well. While mum has frequently mentioned the family kilt and the family name (Gordon) etc etc, the fact that I barely know my father means I had no idea that he also had a Scottish heritage (Lindsay).
I have a feeling I may be opening Pandoras Box here, but as they say (whoever they are) “when in Rome”!!
My Charity
In the coming year for Daniel’s school Nursery, I have decided to donate my time, photographic skill, and equipment to compile a ‘year book’ type disc for every student. The discs will then be sold to the parents with all the proceeds going to the Nursery.
This will be a year long project, with regular visits, and I imagine loads of fun. Wish me luck on this, as I am excited.
Nursery
Speaking of Nursery, It all starts again in little over a week. The summer Holidays have flown with many picnics in the park and visits to friends houses. I have no Idea how we are going to make it there by 9am each morning, I guess it’s meant to start training us all for when school starts the following year. He is just growing up too fast 
30 Day Challenge
I am currently undertaking the 30 Day Challenge. A free course designed to help you make your first $10 online. So far it has taken me through how to research niches and micro niches (both on and off line) and how to work out whether the chosen niche will prosper using keyword analysis. So far very informative and also entertaining. I imagine there will be stuff for sale at the end as they let you ‘test drive’ some rather excellent IM tools for the duration. I will keep you posted.
Business
Meanwhile I will keep building my blog with interesting and fun information about my journey.
Happiness
Happiness is just something we feel isn’t it? …And we can’t help how we feel… can we? Well this might not sit well with everyone, but happiness is actually a choice.
In fact, how we feel everyday is a choice.
Taking full responsibility for our feelings is some of the hardest work we will ever do.
Challenges will continue to face us.
People will always do things we don’t like, or don’t agree with.
We may even be hurt.
It is not what happens, but how we see it that counts.
There is no point in blaming the table when you stub your toe on it. We probably put the table where it is, and chose to walk past it in bare feet.
This is not a case of painting on a fake smile and pretending the challenges are not there, rather riding through them, learning the lesson, taking the appropriate action and moving on.
So why would we hang on to our hurt or anger?
Firstly I believe it’s a way of trying to control someone and holding, them accountable for what “they’ve done to us”.
Holding on to grudges like this hurts us far more than them.
Secondly I think we believe there is some kind of ‘payoff’, an emotional need we may not even be aware of. We often get more attention for being sad, angry, or aggressive or even telling sad stories. (Just have a look at the news)
A large part of peoples’ identity can be tied up with anger (do you have any aggressive friends) disappointment (we’ve all experienced the complainer) and sad feelings in general. To let this all go and move into happiness is a mighty shift in consciousness.
So what steps can we take to live a happier life everyday?
1 Choose to recognize and receive your good.
Good things happen everyday, we just have to see them and accept them (just as writing this my baby boy comes and gives me the best cuddle…. now that is good)
Someone smiles at you… do you smile back?
A friend offers to buy you coffee… do you accept?
This will be cumulative. The more you see, the more you will see!
2 Be Thankful – Start your day in a space of gratitude.
Do you look the Shopkeeper in the eye and say a heart felt Thank You for providing a service to you?
If you are struggling, and finding it hard to be thankful, feel the sun on your face, listen to your (or others) children’s laughter. The more you are thankful for happy moments in your life, the more happy moments the universe will bring to you.
3 Talk the Talk
When someone asks how you are, what do you say Try this
BEST DAY OF MY LIFE (thanks JJ)
What are you saying in your everyday conversation? If you find you are complaining, even just sometimes, check yourself and find something positive to talk about.
4 Thought for the day
What are you saying to yourself? Check in regularly to see if your self-talk is lifting you up or bringing you down. What you think about, you attract into your life, so think happy thoughts and create a happy life!
5 Random acts of kindness
Enter your day with a generous heart. Helping others will inevitably make you feel good about yourself.
As my friend from CarbonCopyPro John Jackson says ‘Do something good for someone in the knowing they can never repay you, this will start to change this world
6 Who is your Influence?
What do your friends, family or work colleagues have you doing, watching and talking about? Do they bring you up or down? Decrease the influence you allow them to have, become the positive influence in their lives. And if you can surround yourself with happy, positive people.
7 Never Feel Guilty
Live with integrity, speak from your heart and run an honest business. Realize that everyone else’s thoughts feelings and circumstances are the result of their own choices.
8 Never Fear-This Too Shall Pass
In the face of all your challenges realize this.
Change your mind and change your life …. Today.
Have You Filled a Bucket Today: A Guide to Daily Happiness for Kids
This week I’ve been a little stuck.
The washing is behind
The dishes are done late
The kids are watching more TV
The floors need cleaning
The list goes on…..
All because of a book
Yes I’ve been reading in any ‘spare’ minute I get.
And the Book?
Richard Branson’s first autobiography ‘Losing My Virginity’
It is honest and personal, engaging and inspiring, entertaining and informative and at times very surprising. There also some incredibly exciting ballooning moments as well.
I am impressed by the man.
He is courageous in business and in life.
He is creative and imaginative.
He has an amazing sense of fun and adventure (and a willingness to “try anything once”)
He thinks laterally,
He produces ways to solve peoples problems (I think this may be one ‘key’ to his success)
He is warm and kind
He looks after his people, who in return look after his business
And finally, his family comes first.
The book reads so easily, like a good novel, and is full of insights about making the most out of business and life.
I have been most impacted by how the book has made me think and feel about parenting.
Personally, I am have been highly influenced by my parents opinions (even silence can be opinionated!), and now wonder how my opinions could limit my sons?
Branson’s parents only gave him their opinion when he asked them!
I wonder where he’d be today had his parents had ever doubted him.
As parents we all have ideas and hopes for our children, and we can also be their biggest critics. In an attempt to protect them and guide them to where we believe they should be going, we may also be limiting their potential….. Certainly food for thought.
I would definitely recommend this book whether you’re in business or not, (and whether you can remember the 60s or not!)
It has left me a little breathless
In the words of Branson himself…
“…to be successful you have to be out there, you have to hit the ground running, and if you have a good team around you and more than your fair share of luck you might make something happen. But you certainly can’t guarantee it just by following someone else’s formula.”
Losing My Virginity: How I’ve Survived, Had Fun, and Made a Fortune Doing Business My Way
Money, The Universe and Everything: A Candid Discussion
Photo from FreeDigitalPhotos.net
I like to think while I walk. …. So today while I was walking, my Little Man found yet another 5p on the footpath and it got me thinking …..
You see Daniel attracts wealth, Everyday since we arrived in the UK he has found at least 1p lying on the ground.
Everyday since last December! He also lets it go just as easily (he is four)
This got me thinking about the fact that children in their natural state live in complete abundance, the universe provides everything they could possibly want and need. And they just KNOW this to be true. (Poverty is a human created state, not a natural state)
In our natural state we are all (humans and animals and plants) born into and designed to live in complete abundance. The Earth is an abundant place.
So why do we ‘forget’ this and start to presume and even expect lack in our lives? So many things influence us throughout our lives. We allow everything from what we should and should not eat to the ‘best suburb’ to live in to be influenced by parents, extended family, friends, politics, media, you name it.
Our parents tell us to get a job and save for the future, not to take risks. Our friends frown upon any attempts we make to change our lives for the better. These influences can be blunt (Like the Media) or extremely subtle, a slight frown or tone of voice in response to an idea can drain your confidence like puling out the bath plug!
Most of the time these ‘influencers’ are simply trying to protect us and have no idea of the consequences. You can’t blame them, they just don’t know : )
But here’s the thing, nothing happens to us that we do not allow (often on a subconscious level). As we become adults we can choose which beliefs to keep and which to throw away and how we allow the influence from our past to affect our lives. (What have you been telling yourself today?) It is important to acknowledge old thought patterns and let them go. Exchange them for positive talk. The only person who controls your thoughts is you and no one can ‘make’ you think or feel anything.
So lets look at how this relates to money. The way I see it money is simply a means, the energy of abundance in manifest form. It is a representation of your attitude towards abundance. (Hint if you’re holding on to it too tightly, you won’t make room for any more.)
To attract money into our lives we MUST have a good…. no GREAT relationship with it. See it as infinite energy. Allow it to flow to us, and away from us! (The richest people on earth are also the biggest philanthropists).
To allow it to flow to you is to see yourself as DESERVING OF COMPLETE AND ABSOLUTE ABUNDANCE, to and to allow it to flow OUT is to have complete trust that there is more than enough to go ‘round
The beauty of it is, the more we take responsibility for our thoughts, and exchange the negative ones for positive ones, the more goodness will come to us.
So what is blocking you? Are your inner thoughts preventing abundance from flowing to you?
Change your mind and change your life.
